Don’t judge a book by its cover!

Don’t judge a book by its cover!

It was suggesting that children who have parents with tattoos might somehow be neglected.  Why do we judge someone due to some ink on their skin?

The article was supposedly sponsored by an organization called Christians against Tattoos.  I went to Google to find out if there was such an organization and could not find one.  So, in fact, this is probably just one person’s version of what they think is the biblical stance on this subject, which, being a religious person myself, annoyed me.  I started fantasizing about what would happen if this person ever came face to face with a Christian who HAD tattoos and was a single parent to boot, that would be worth seeing.

It was surprising that over 79,000 shares went out on this picture and yet I cannot find where it originated from.  Here is the link I first saw and being a writer myself, you will, of course, see a comment in there from me if you are interested in looking at it.

I  have a daughter who is not only a single mom:  which stereotypically is also another cause for concern for a child’s well-being, but she has tattoos. I know how much she sacrifices for her son. Those tattoos did not turn her into a selfish, neglectful person at all. In fact, she is an extremely caring, loving person who gives 100% of herself to her son and his needs. This is the same daughter that in previous articles I have spoken about, battled with the school system to get the help needed for her son. She stood up and refused to be pushed into doing something for the convenience of the teacher because she felt it was not a healthy choice.  She is someone who has enough backbone to express herself with ink and still be and do all that is necessary to be all her child will need in life to feel loved, cared for and protected. And she will do what it takes to shield him from people like this person whose prejudiced ideas are trying to incite hate.   I think children with tattooed and pierced parents will be a much kinder generation, appreciative of all people no matter race, colour, beliefs or style.

To prove my point, ironically,  I sat beside a wonderful, young, single parent on my recent business trip that had a 10-month-old daughter with her.  The first thing I noticed was how happy the baby was.   Not long into the flight the mother took off her sweater and guess what? Yep, you got it; she had a big tattoo on her arm.  Of course, I had not read the article by this time, so was not aware of how I should have reacted and so did not call children’s aid on her.  I am being extremely sarcastic here at this point in case you didn’t know.

During the flight, this amazing mom told me a bit about her difficult story.  She has a  sister who helps her out and she seems to have a good network of friends, but the parenting part she is pretty much doing on her own and from what I could see, she is going a good job.

She had not been on a flight with a baby before, but you wouldn’t have known it. She rolled with it like a pro, sacrificing her water to make formula, her own food was going into the little mouth that kept opening up and she even sacrificed her seat by sitting on the floor so her daughter could lie down and rest.  I guess she didn’t know her tattoos were supposed to make her selfish.  In everything she did, she focused on her precious daughter.  I was blessed to see her commitment and love.  At one point when her sister got up, this young woman allowed her baby to stand up between us while we talked.  Slowly the little one made her way over to me and started to snuggle with me. The mom started to apologize and I told her unless she was concerned about her daughter’s safety, I didn’t mind at all. In fact, I loved it.

There is no way this sweet, lovable little girl didn’t have a great example in her life: and that example was sitting on the floor of the plane while her daughter rested.

The second thing I noticed was how small the mom was. Too small it seemed to be able to carry her chubby precious cargo around without suffering from pain. I witnessed her carrying her daughter several times throughout the week at the resort. According to this article, I am surprised the ink did not make this mom feel lazy and just leave the little one to fend for herself.  Instead, I saw this amazing mother take her daughter to the beach and play in the waves with her, take her into the pool and let her splash around. Walked into the nearby town and beach areas so they could spend time together. Not once did I see her depend on anyone else, or ask the staff to take her daughter for her for a while.

Let’s face it, if we were to consider all the possible things a parent could do that would make them more selfish than not, I do not see how ink on the skin comes even close to being a factor. Now if a parent was to wear high heels and lots of makeup all the time that would be a much more logical reason for thinking someone might be neglecting their child.  It would take up so much more time to do all the primping and a lot more grumpy, fewer patient moms for having to wear those high heels shoes all day. You should be thinking right now, and correctly so that this is a ridiculous thought, well so is assuming someone with ink on their skin is a neglectful parent.

I think it is time as a society that we stop labelling people: by what they wear, including permanent things such as tattoos and piercings, and start being more concerned about what they do, how they act, and how they speak to their children.  There is an old quote that is so profound and timeless that says  “Don’t judge a book by its cover”.  Let’s start to be as compassionate and understanding as we claim to be and start standing up for the children who are really neglected or abused instead of stereotypically throwing all people into one pot because of what they do or do not wear.

Your Children or Your Spouse?

Your Children or Your Spouse?

My newest article came out in the magazine “Grown ups”.

Thanks to the whole gang over there for helping me get exposure and in turn I hope my audience all checks out their magazine and enjoys this article.

Please click on the picture and it will take you to the posting.